Ten Minutes

Prompted by Jena, here I go:

Feeling exhausted, don't really know why. Too much sugar today? Or perhaps it's the punctuation after the unusually restful previous two days while E was visiting his grandparents and there were only two (humans) under four feet in the house (and two felines).

Feeling untethered, craving connection, but too tired to write, just surfing instead, visiting all you wonderful people, but almost too tired to leave comments, being voyeureuse, lurking instead. Why not get off, at least connect with the one other human in this house who is conscious?

Feeling a bit stressed I suppose. Vacation is supposed to be happy and fun. I suddenly realized that our laid back trip is coming up very soon, and no plans have been made, or at least they haven't been finalized. One must make plans, right? And charge up the portable movie player for the drive. And bring the tent. And get someone to care for the cats. And we'll only be gone 5 days and staying at the family cottage, but still ...

I am still making progress. The work room is getting more organized. Soon, I may actually be able to work in there, to cut some glass, make some progress on my project. But it feels good even just to put a few more things in order.

V is delightful at five months, eating sweet potatoes, rice cereal, and pears, playing in his jumperoo, on his baby gym, and sometimes, still, only wanting to be held. He has started to delight in baths, only an inch or so of warm water in the tub, sitting (with help) or lying down, splashing, cooing, giggling, and squealing with delight. His delight is my delight.

Didn't succeed in not editing this post, but at least I didn't edit it much.

I've been wanting to say, though, and haven't figured out how to change my profile quite the way I want it, that I go by rocketmom here, but my name is really Cheryl.

Progress

We decided that we've had enough of trying to coerce E. to go use the potty when he evidently needs to, or might need to, only to have no success, followed by a dirty diaper 5 minutes later. So, we decided, it's time to put the whole process in his hands. If he asks, we'll change him, or go with him to the bathroom. Today ... he wore the same sopping wet diaper from the time he woke up, through the morning when it became dirty, and into the afternoon. Finally, at nap time (which we have re-instituted, as it is difficult to get to bed on time with the late summer light), he asked for a change. Progress!

At my stained glass class tonight, I continued working on building a lampshade. I cut 32 usable pieces tonight. Progress!

I pushed enough piles and boxes out of the middle of the living room that I could vacuum. I even vacuumed the hairy stairs. Progress!

R. had his first day of summer school - he's taking phys. ed. Summer school gym class is much cheaper than camp ... and we are *finally* getting him out to interact with his peers. Progress!

We'll take it day by day.

A Critique of My Habits

Umpteen Habits of Highly Ineffectual People

Sometimes I think this should be the subtitle for a book about my life. Surely it's more than seven, in any case. It's summer! I've got plenty of ideas about where to take the boys, ways to entertain and educate ourselves, but we rarely manage to get out the door. And tomorrow, summer school already starts. Before I know it first grade will be here.

So what are these habits that keep us home and bring out my inner critic?

1. Reading. I love to read. I just devoured Three Cups of Tea in the course of two days. How, you might ask, could I do that with three boys at home? Well, I must admit I wasn't very attentive to the family for a few days, and I got less sleep than usual, as well. I found the book to be very compelling. At least it compelled me to finish reading quickly! What a treat to read about someone who is really making a difference in the world, one community at a time. Perhaps it will even compel me to get off my ... couch and make a difference myself.

2. Letting the boys lead. They want to play a game, pretend to be chefs, read some books, play outside, chase each other around the house, and, oh yes, the littlest one wants to nurse, it seems all day long lately. I imagine he's teething, because I like to have a reason for everything.

3. Trying to organize the house. We were functional after about a week of unpacking, but we still have probably a dozen left, in varying degrees emptiness, and it will still be a while before all of our things find a good place in our home. Some progress, though - the second fridge and some of our empty boxes were picked up by a willing new owner on Friday. And the walls of the basement rec/play/entertainment/family room are painted. The second couch has been moved downstairs. The CD's and DVD's are on their shelf. Now, just one more box at a time ...

4. Wandering around the echo chambers in my head. I keep telling myself the same things over and over again, but for some reason I wander back to listen again anyway.

Not really much here for the critic to pick on.

Well, I thought the reading days were a bit unbalanced. I would have liked to see more time spent with the boys.

I did that yesterday.

You should also be making more progress organizing the house.

That was the day before yesterday.

You're not taking any time for yourself or being creative.

Art class is on Monday, and who do you think the reading days were for?

You spend too much time rehashing the same situations and ideas in your head. You think about journal entries and then repeat them multitudes of times until you either write or forget. You start blog posts in your head and they are on endless loop, too.

You got me there. So if my hands are free, I'll write instead of listening to the echoes in my head. But it doesn't really hurt anyone.

I won, I won! I knew you needed to improve.

Nobody's perfect, but I'm the best me you'll ever meet.

You can go now. I don't have anything else for you to review.

Baby Daze

Now I remember
that what goes in must come out-
Sweet potato poop.

Loving life

Lazy days, thunderstorms, roses and more mysterious flowers blooming in our overgrown flower bed. One yellow iris feebly pokes its head out from among the mass of not-yet-blooming suspected daylillies.

Visiting family, boys playing with relatives, Grandpa seems unchanging, but Grandma looks old. Too much birthday cake but that's what parties are for. Tornado sirens intermittently throughout the afternoon, thankfully disappointed by seeing none.

Neighborhood walk and bike ride with mom, nice to have help getting out of the house, pass by future school, stop at toy store for rewards to be earned by good behavior, first visit to large indie coffee shop for small selection of sandwiches with our drinks. Exasperated when he decides to be king, blocking shop doors and insisting that each walks where he demands, pushing and hitting when he doesn't get his way. Exasperated again later when he has a dirty diaper moments after leaving the potty without any success. Boys run out of energy, briefly, for a few moments, until batteries seem magically recharged.

Come home and smell the roses, listen to baby coos, preschool giggles, and big-kid logic. Goodnight, mom; we'll see you tomorrow. Late goodnight to all. Life is good.

Summer

Pulling firm teeth or
leaving the house with three boys,
both are difficult.

Outside sticky heat
rolls off in bright beads of sweat,
can't shake off the air.

Green fields fill my view
in varied hues of lawns, trees
bushes and hillsides.

Boys melt in the heat
but won't exchange favorite
cold weather clothing.

Dark skies ominous
to travelling minivan;
thunder, lightening.

Ozone-laden air
suddenly hammers the roof
and floods the roadways.

A haiku artist
I am not -writing briefly
today nonetheless.

Good to be alive -
lazy days inside and out
leave judgement behind.